Feeling Free

For the past 3 years, I have become keenly aware of the many personality differences Ben and I have. One in particular has given me great difficulty in that I wish I was more like him in this area. (I will keep it vague in hopes that the overall concept may be helpful to some of you.)

I've struggled with it intently - even feeling that I was in the wrong for naturally not possessing this particular tendency - I felt incredibly guilty and failed at every attempt to manufacture it. "Why can't I be more. . . ." "What's wrong with me???!!" I felt so desperate at times.

I was in quiet torment until a dear friend of mine simply said, "If God wants you to have an ability and tendency for this, then He will grow you into that".

What a freeing sentence that was for me. I can't be anything other than what God intended for me to be. I can't fake the gifts that God has not given me, and no forcing will change it.

I face this reality pretty much every day - feeling guilty and defeated because of it, but now finally, I can remind myself of her words. Three years of torture is over.

Thank you, Lord for Your freeing simplicity

and for friends who speak refreshing words.